What sort of man drinks his wife’s breast milk?

I love Joe Wicks but I’m worried about where his new fad – filmed as he walked with his family to a Taylor Swift concert – might lead…

There seems no end to the trendy “alternative” milks that people will drink nowadays. Almond milk, oat milk, soy milk. Hemp, hazelnut, walnut, cashew, rice, quinoa, pea, potato…
Each to his own, I suppose. All the same, I really do think we should draw the line at the following.
Drinking your own wife’s breast milk.
As far as I’m aware, this is not yet a widespread trend. I fear, however, that it may take off, now that it has the backing of an extremely popular celebrity. 
This week, Joe “The Body Coach” Wicks – the 38-year-old author of Lean in 15 and many other bestselling recipe books – was taking his family to see Taylor Swift at Wembley, when, for reasons that remain unclear, he decided to drink a cup of the breast milk that his wife Rosie had just expressed. He even filmed himself doing it, and uploaded the video to his official page on Instagram.
“Liquid gold, Mama’s milk,” he enthusiastically informed his 4.8million followers. “The energy and nutrients are unbelievable, and actually, believe it or not, it tastes really sweet, like a natural sweet vanilla milk. No wonder babies love sugar and sweet stuff. Down the hatch… Thanks, Rose. Thanks for your milk!”
Normally, I yield to no one in my admiration for Mr Wicks. He has built up a spectacularly successful business empire solely on the back of his own hard work, talent and puppyish adorability. And, during the Covid lockdown, his free workout videos encouraged millions of housebound schoolchildren (and their parents) to get some much-needed exercise.
Nonetheless, I dread to think where this peculiar new enthusiasm of his might lead. What nutritious recipes will his next book contain? Breast milk ice cream? Breast milk panna cotta? Breast milkshake?
We must urgently nip this unsettling notion in the bud, before it becomes the next big showbiz craze. Countless celebrities, from Cara Delavigne to Katy Perry, already sell their own branded beverages. I just hope Mr Wicks hasn’t given them any ideas.
Quite apart from anything else, I can’t imagine many people over the age of six months being eager to follow his example. The very thought makes me shudder. Is this something that new fathers really do? Then again, I suppose we’ll never know for sure. Because, even if there are lots of fathers who are bonkers enough to do it, there can’t be many who would be bonkers enough to admit it. At least, I hope not. Despite having asked the question, I think I’d rather they kept the answer to themselves.
As for why Mr Wicks did it, I do have one possible theory. In 2020 he published Wean in 15, a book containing recipes and advice for parents introducing their babies to solid foods. And in it, Mr Wicks revealed that he himself did not have “the best start in life when it came to nutrition”, because he was “raised on formula milk from birth and didn’t get a single ounce of breast milk.”
So perhaps he’s just trying to catch up.